Today is our one-week anniversary with Claire.  But instead of a celebratory day, it has been an interesting day of highs and lows.  Claire has really struggled today and it’s been a bit of a sad day for us.  We won’t go into all of the details … but suffice to say, it’s clear that the attachment and bonding process still has a way to go.  Probably the saddest moment for us was when we asked her if she was happy to be part of our family and we got a definite “No” … followed by tears.  We know this is normal and that there will be up and down days … today was just definitely of the down variety.

That isn’t to say it was all terrible … after a particularly difficult time this morning we ended up having a family game of “stand on the bed volleyball” (which is played with a balloon).  Very fun and everybody was laughing.  That was the sad part, I guess.  She is having fun … but I think she still believes that we are another set of caregivers that will leave at some point.  It breaks our hearts.  Again, we know this is normal … but that knowledge is cold comfort during the tough times.

Anyway, we ate breakfast and then headed to the clinic for a follow up with the doctor on the TB test.  SUCCESS!  She’s free and clear with no need for X-Rays or anything else at this point.  Thank you so much for your prayers; we definitely felt this was a HUGE blessing for us and for Claire.  Dr. Judd … you’ll be the next stop of this kind!

Our guide, Helen, then decided to take us to the big nearby market (the one I had been searching for yesterday).  I was only a block off at one point in my search!  Darn!  It really is a great place and we were able to find a number of things we were looking for.  Some gifts for the kids and some special items for Claire that we’ll give her at special moments in her future life … 16th birthday, college graduation, wedding, etc.  We also ate lunch at a GREAT pizzeria.  29 yuan (about $4.50 USD) for a pizza and some spaghetti!  This market area is what we’ve been looking for since arriving in Guangzhou … we’ll likely head there again tomorrow.  Thanks to Helen for leading us here … it really is perfect for what we were looking for.

After that we headed back to the hotel.  I grabbed our dirty laundry and headed back to Jenny’s while Sandy and Claire went to the hotel lobby.  Sandy will have to elaborate on her experience and conversation she had while there.  I’ll give the quick-quick version.  She met a man who is here adopting (with his wife, but she isn’t here, his 16 year old son is with him) his fourth Chinese child.  They also have 4 biological children … so EIGHT!  Here’s the neat part.  The son they are picking up right now is older and is a “little person” (it’s not un-PC to call him a dwarf here).  They met him while they were adopting their 2nd Chinese child … he lived in the same orphanage as that child and just latched on to them at the time.  Long story short … they inquired about adopting him shortly after and were told it was impossible … he was “un-adoptable” due to his size.  They pushed the issue and asked what would happen to him.  The Chinese government told them that he would be placed in a home for those with mental retardation.  IMAGINE!  They protested, stating the obvious that he wasn’t mentally retarded and actually was VERY bright.  They said that was just what was done here.  At this point they really started to put on the pressure.  While picking up their 3rd Chinese child they asked if they could take the entire orphanage staff to lunch … provided this boy was able to join.  To their surprise, the staff also brought a bag with clothes for a week with them.  He stayed with them for an entire week, but had to go back after that … I honestly can’t imagine how difficult that would be.  Anyway, after that they redoubled their efforts and the government finally relented in allowing the adoption.  They were required to sign some sort of special contract in order to make it happen (probably an indemnification of some kind).  One of the really touching things he told Sandy was something to this effect … “My wife asked if we could really afford to do this, how would we pay for it and would our family be OK with it.  My response was that we will pay for it in mental anguish if we don’t do it.  Can we really live knowing that we left this child to such a future?”

Here’s the thing … we’ve had the chance to talk to numerous adoptive families at this point and there is a common thread.  We all feel “called” to it in some way.  There is a decided Christian bent to it as well.  And so many different kinds of families, different ages and stages in life, different personalities.  So many of the stories being shared with us are so compelling, in a way, our story feels so pedestrian in comparison.  We feel so blessed to have met and talked to so many amazing people!   We feel compelled to be better, to do more and to love in ways we’re not exactly sure how to yet … but we know with God’s help we can.  We love Claire so much and are so grateful for the blessing she is to us.  Hard times will come …we know that … but we also know that this blessing has been delivered to us through God’s will.  We will do our best to be worthy of it.

Shifting gears a bit … the next thing we did was a very fun FIRST!  Swimming in the (freezing) hotel pool!  It was very fun and Claire couldn’t get enough of it.  She had planned this earlier in the day and reminded us about every 5 minutes that it was on the schedule.  (We’re not kidding about the schedule.  Claire announced it this morning and in her words it  went something like this:  sun wake up, eat breakfast, talk to Helen, show doctor owie, swim).  Even though it was so cold … she absolutely loved it.  It was actually much warmer out of the water … so we made sure she had plenty of breaks warming up.  To be fair … I acclimated to the water within a few minutes … so it wasn’t “scout camp” cold.  Videos and pictures below. By the way, just to be clear … I’m pretty sure all of the “little girl” screaming about the cold water came from Sandy or Claire … definitely not from me. Are we all clear on that? I just want to make sure everybody understands that before we move forward.

So … we’re good … right? OK … on to the show.

After that we headed back to the room and Claire was able to watch her newly purchased Xi Yang Yang video (translated Xi Yang Yang means “pleasant goat”).  It’s a very funny cartoon here in China that she loves … so we bought her a small collection to take back home.  We were flipping through the channels with the remote control last night and Claire told us that she used to watch Xi Yang Yang at Baba Mao’s house (the orphanage) – so now we know what the flat screen TV on the orphanage wall was used for.  She also said Baba Mao was good at pushing the buttons on the remote.  Good for him!!  :)   We’re also hoping the video might aid in keeping a bit of her Chinese up for a few years.  Sandy then tried to help Claire paint her fingernails, although Claire didn’t really want the help and they therefore didn’t turn out great.  It literally looked like she dipped her fingers in the bottle.  She promises next time that she’ll let mom help:)

The night ended really great with a collection of songs that Sandy has always sung to the kids. Claire loved this song …

Claire we love you,
Yes we do,
Father in Heaven has blessed us with you,
When we are near you,
We love to hear you,
Whisper so softly that you love us too.
Claire we love you, we love you we do.

So that one was sung about 10 times before bedtime. She would close her eyes and sway her head back and forth. Feeling much better about things after experiences like that.